Blackout
by yllimilly
Summary: AU. FULL GENDERBENT CAST. Ryou is a shy, girly teenage with a dark secret. Joey is a tough gal carrying the world on her shoulders. Will they open up and gain each other's trust, or shy away from what their heart wants? Batteryshipping Ryou-Joey-Bakura.
1. prelude

AN: This was originally meant to be a contest oneshot, but I dropped off the contest and like the plunnie so much I decided to make it a multi instead. This is a genderbent AU that closely reflects the canon, in some ways. Enjoy. -Milly

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**blackout**

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prelude (before and after the light)

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Ryou wasn't allowed to see her grandmother anymore after 'the incident'. She wasn't even told in which home her legal guardian had (been) moved to. Atsushi Bakura, rather than taking a cumbersome two week leave in the middle of his data mining ventures somewhere across the globe, instead had had temporary arrangements made for his daughter.

He had her move into a boarding school. An all girls boarding school. She hadn't objected, but then again she had no other choice.

Neither father nor daughter wanted to know what the next step would be if her situation ever worsened.

Not that it'd hurt to change schools now, in the middle of the academic year. Ryou wasn't sure she'd be able to befriend the few remaining classmates she hadn't alienated after... 'the incident'.

She had to move to another town altogether, a town where she had no history of shoplifting or assault or arson.

Domino City had the cheapest all girls boarding program and had vacancy to accommodate her. As her train entered the city, fleeing the seaside and deep into the mountains, Ryou had no trouble understanding why.

Graffiti tags laced the bottom of warehouses and modest houses. Three tall chimneys could be seen in the distance, their greyish secretions covering everything with fine layers of soot. The sun was about to set, briefly reddening the skies. Workers would soon be going in their small homes, with or without their families. The small windows of the bigger apartment complexes at the outskirts of the city looked like gigantic dies, some windows lit, some not, black like holes. Ryou looked away.

On her lap was a dark brown wooden hoop, firmly holding in place a humble squareful of beige cotton and the embroidered half of an egg. The thread she had used to etch the egg was the same colour as the fabric, as if though camouflaging on the canevas. Ryou thought, briefly, that she too sometimes wished she could just blend in with her surroundings and live a quiet, peaceful, uneventful life.

Fate had decided otherwise, for better or for worse.

Beneath her dress and right next to the bare the skin covering her ribcage, Ryou could feel the clinging, moist metal of the Ring, warm from the body heat it had been stealing.

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_tbc: chapter one: white lies_


	2. white lies

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**blackout**

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A/N  
>Build up will be slow for this story. Lots of introspection. Thank you suscribers! -Milly<p>

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one. white lies

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Ryou sat idle, playing with the laced rim of her white summer dress. She had hoped to arrive before the end of the school day but getting lost on her way from the station to the school ruined her plans. She has stubbed her toes countless times against the uneven cobble-stone streets of old downtown. Now that she was sitting idle, waiting for the nurse in duty to go over her file before she'd be allowed to go to her dorm, Ryou noticed, much to her dismay, that the sole of her white ballerina shoes had ripped in places, and that they weren't so white anymore.

The silence that had settled in the room while the nurse reviewed her health form was excruciating. Ryou thought of her embroidery project to keep her mind (from) going. She could see the shape of the hoop through the fabric of a wide, flat pocket on the side of her suitcase.

"Epilepsy?" The nurse's voice broke her train of thought.

"Yes," said Ryou simply. Short answers made the safest lies.

"And you don't have any meds for that?"

"No." That, at least was true.

There could never be any medication to get rid of... that. The nurse just humphed in reply, scanning the rest of the sheet, leaving Ryou to silence. She dreaded the day she'd be forced to take meds, had not the faintest idea how 'it' would react to them...

The nurse flipped over the next page, mumbling as she read to herself. Ryou had an itch she couldn't scratch through her thick, white stockings. The air conditioning gave her arms goosebumps. She wished she'd pack a scarf, but there was only so much her small suitcase could handle. At least she had plenty of headbands and summer tops and little dresses she could wear... outside school.

During school, she'd have to wear a school uniform that would both make her go unnoticed in the female crowds, but also stand out, because school uniforms tended to be navy blue, and that really brought out the worse of her pale complexion. She got weird looks and weirder comments for it, but there always seemed to have some hint of envy in the noisy girls' voices when they dared speak their mind to Ryou.

"Your emergency contact is overseas," remarked the nurse without lifting her eyes from the form, clearly annoyed by any situation that didn't fit exactly the standard procedures, and unwillingly to bypass them.

"My father's taking a sabbatical in Syria," explained Ryou simply.

"Syria. Not the best place to be," mused the staff questioningly, not daring to probe the kid further.

"He's an archeologist." Ryou had learned over time that keeping her tone and face expression neutral rebuked even the most curious people. She wanted to tell the woman off, to tell her that the school's headmistress had okay'ed everything over the phone with her father.

But it wasn't in Ryou's nature to interfere, so she kept to herself, not letting her impatience show.

"Humph." The nurse gave it more thought. "Well, we're going to need a local number. Do you have any relatives that...?"

She casually mentioned her grandmother, not revealing the fact that she had no idea how to contact her, and nodded when the nurse told her to drop by her office again when Ryou would get her info.

"Are you okay with walking by yourself in the dark? I can't walk you up to the dorms. I have to stay here in case something happens."

"No, I'll be fine." She was already standing, her suitcase in hand, facing the exit.

"I can have someone from security take you there," the nurse added, readying herself to make the phone call.

"No, I'm okay."

She opened the door, and left.

The physical world had become a whole lot less scary since her father's gift disrupted her life.

Ryou Bakura wasn't afraid of the dark. She had worse things to be afraid of.

The lukewarm breeze hugged her and went on, rustling the oak's leaves playfully, then leaving. The air was heavy, muting the distant hums of the air conditioning systems.

The school grounds looked beautifully eerie at this time of day. Old fashioned lamp posts and tall, century old trees dotted the lane connecting the infirmary to the seniors' dorm. The tiny wheels on Ryou's suitcase suffered from the rough gravel coating the narrow path. Two, maybe three hundred steps to her new life.

She'd been to a lot of schools before, but never a boarding school. The last person she had shared a room with was her little brother. She steered her thoughts away. Blackouts, she felt, were more frequent when she let herself slip into her family, and what her life could have been without the accident.

She swiped her keycard in what she thought to be the building's main door. Before she could grab the handle, the door opened to three rowdy, loud girls about Ryou's age, casually dressed in bright colored tank tops and sweat pants, with fresh hairdos and leaving behind them the faint smell of nail polish. One of the girls, who had nearly bumped in Ryou, not expecting to see her at the door, turned her head to say 'Sorry!' before catching up with the other girls, hopping on one foot to get rid of a rock that had gotten in her flip flop.

Ryou watched them walk away out of the path. One after the other, the girls turned to catch a glance of Ryou, whispering amidst bursts of laughter, turning again to look at the stranger. When they were far enough Ryou couldn't make their faces, so she swiped the card again and entered the dorm undisturbed, trying not to wonder what the girls had been saying about her.

She had entered a well-lit hallway. As she walked on, taking in everything around her, her future dormmates' voices grew louder and louder, bouncing off the concrete walls who soon gave way to a huge glass window.

Ryou stopped to observe the girls lounging around in the big leisure room. A good dozen girls her age chatted, some slouching in old but plush couches, playing with their iPods, others engaged in heated arguments. At a wooden table, a group of three more or less tomboyish girls played a some sort of card game.

It seemed like cliques had already been made, and Ryou feared it would be hard to make friends now that the first month of school had passed.

She wanted to befriend the three gamers. One of them had hay like blonde hair and sat with one knee folded below her chin; she played against the shorter, black haired girl with strange highlights, and a taller, short haired brunette watched the game intently. Ryou was a gamer too, well, had been, before she threw herself into embroidery, and missed the competitive fun of dueling.

She suddenly became aware that the girls could see her through the glass wall just like she could see them. One girl saw her. Then another. Soon enough a half dozen stares were on her, not her as a person, but on her pale skin and unusual white hair. She blushed; her feet felt cemented to the ground. The decibels in the room lowered, and Ryou just wished she could blend in with the bright orange expanse of paint behind her. She awkwardly waved to nobody in particular as her feet took her away, anywhere but away from the accidental spotlight. Part of her had hoped to catch the gamer's attention, too, but they missed her completely, absorbed as they were in their duel.

Away from curious eyes Ryou felt her heartbeat slow down. From a pocket she produced the neatly folded sheet of paper that would take her to her RA, who in turn would provide her with orientation and guide her to her own room.

S. Kaiba, Room 413.

It took her a few minutes and more efforts to climb up the stairs all the way to the fourth floor, taking her luggage along.

The walls here were baby blue. It came out as 'cold', rather than 'calming'. Every door was white, with paint chipping at the bottom, fading around the doorknobs.

Room 413 was in the middle of the hallway, which Ryou thought unusual.

She knocked.

After a minute of silence, she checked the room number, then the sheet of paper, then knocked again. Someone came.

"Kate, I told you- Oh." The girl wore brand name pj's and headphones, which she took off. They blasted music so loud that Ryou could make out the lyrics. "You looking for someone?"

"Yes. Are you Kay- Kaiba?"

"Kaiba? Over there." The girl pointed the other end of the hallway. "Are you new here?"

Ryou nodded.

"I'm Ashley."

"Ryou." She held out her hand for the girl to shake. The girl's hand was warm and dry, unlike hers.

"Don't let Kaiba intimidate you. She's good. Deep inside. Reeeal deep." She chuckled. Her room smelled of fabric softener. Clean and homey. Ryou hoped she'd be getting a roommate like her.

"I will. I mean, I won't." Ryou smiled a little. "Thank you."

"G'night."

Ryou walked to room 418, at the end of the hallway.

On the door was a simple A4 sheet with the bold letters RA printed on it. Below that was a pinned, empty envelope labeled 'Inquiries'. And next to the doorframe was one of those small sliding signs set to bright red BUSY.

She hated to be doing this. One encounter had been nerve racking enough. She didn't need a tour of the dorms nor being taken by the hand like a child to her room. At 16, she was very much able to manage on her own.

"Ka-i-ba. Kaiba. Kaiba," she whispered to herself just to make sure she'd get it right. After taking a deep breath she knocked, fearing she'd woken up a flesh-eating dragon or something.

"Come on in," said a clear voice from inside. Hesitantly Ryou turned the doorknob to reveal an impeccable room, soberly decorated with warm browns and stylish silver. A massive oak desk, cluttered with imposing piles even more imposing books, stood between the door and the rest of the room, and the girl - presumably Kaiba - sat behind it, facing the entrance, just like in a regular office.

Kaiba hadn't looked up to greet Ryou, focusing on the three school manuals laid out before her, taking notes and she read, skipping from one document to the other. Ryou didn't quite know what she was doing, and frankly hoped that the schoolwork at this school wasn't as hard as this scene let on.

"Excuse me..."

"I heard you," said Kaiba abruptly, not looking up, "just tell me what you need."

"My name is Ryou Bakura, I'm a new student." She wasn't bold enough to say 'the' new student.

The brunette didn't flinch. "Take the yellow sheet over here and read it. You can sit down." Kaiba didn't bother motioning toward the empty chair. Her tone wasn't rude or impatient, if not a little curt.

"I can read it in my room, I just don't want to be a nuisance."

Then Kaiba looked up. She had striking features, fair blue eyes, and was young enough to afford looking beautiful without having to smile. She looked very smart, not something you'd expect from a high schooler. Her black turtleneck and discreet, natural makeup made her look very mature for her age.

"You're not bothering me. You can interrupt me to ask me any questions you like. When you're done, I'll give you a brief tour," she glanced at the small clock sitting next to her pencil case, "and show you to your room. That good?"

Ryou nodded.

Kaiba might not actually be a student here, she thought before sitting on the wooden chair and reading the rules in silence. Kaiba had already dove back into her studying. One of the books had the word 'jurisprudence' printed on its cover.

Ryou scanned the rules absent mindedly, distracted by her surroundings. Not only was Kaiba's room elegant and tidy save for the improvised bookshelf/computer parts warehouse on the lower half of her bunk bed structure, it also smelled good. If all rooms were that nice, then... Ryou smiled at the thought.

"I'm done."

Kaiba had her initialize each page, seemingly pleased that Ryou didn't have any questions to ask her. Some of the rules might cause her problems, like the 10 PM curfew, but other than that she didn't smoke, have a cell phone, even less a boyfriend, so she was in the clear. Kaiba disappeared behind one of the book towers to retrieve another sheet from one of her drawers.

"You're in room 302 with... Josephine Wheeler. I hope you don't have a problem with germs," she mocked.

"I'm not," she replied automatically, her smile waning by the second. "Why do you ask?"

"Oh, you'll see," and Kaiba's private joke ended there.

She stood up, revealing her glorious 5'10" as she led Ryou outside the room.

"We'll grab your uniform on the way." She locked her room digitally and slid the cover on the BUSY sign to reveal the AWAY sign. It seemed like the RA was never 'available' for her dormmates.

"So you're a student here," offered Ryou as a light conversation starter.

"Haha! Technically, yes." A derisive laughter punctuated the premature end of the conversation. Ryou didn't have the courage to press for more. She wanted to know her first name. Or was S the first letter of her last name?

The school uniforms were navy blue like Ryou had feared, and smelled of cleaning products. The third floor was almost as spotless as the fourth one, if not a little noisier. Having Kaiba next door must really keep the fourth floor girls on their toes, Ryou concluded.

"Well, here you are. Give your keycard a shot."

Ryou didn't know what to expect from room 302. The handle felt greasy. The door had dusty stains near the floor, at the spot one's shoe soles would connect with the door when openine it with their feet. There were little rocks and dried mud bits all around the door frame.

Ryou looked up to a sneering Kaiba. Whe she crossed her arms over her chest like this, there was nothing the color black could do to prevent her breasts from looking bigger than they actually were. Ryou looked away precipitately, hoping she hadn't been staring for too long, or that Kaiba had noticed. She'd rather not know. All the blood in her body was being pumped into the tips of her ears. The door opened for her...

But only partially.

Ryou peeked in to see one lone shoe blocking the door. "I think I'm okay," she whispered.

"Oh I think you will be. You two will get along just fine..."

Ryou was tempted to expose her catastrophic blush to Kaiba, just to confirm the smile that she thought she heard in her voice. "Thank you."

"Well, that's all for tonight. Breakfast is served from 7:30. Welcome to 's. I'll see you in class."

"Thank you," Ryou breathed this time, once Kaiba's footsteps sounded far enough. She clutched the fabric of her dress as if it'd slow down the heaving in her chest.

The room smelled foul and looked awful. Nothing like the leggy RA's room. Not a square foot of the floor had been spared, it seemed, from clothes of variable degrees of cleanliness to food wrappers to teenage girl magazines (albeit very few of them).

There wasn't a sheet or school manual or anything looking like a school supply to be found, though. Not even a schoolbag. There were two small grey desks and matching folding chairs on each side of the room. Beside each stood a dresser. None had escaped the storm, but Ryou could tell the left side was being used for storage, and one for their actual purpose.

So she entered the room, closed the door behind her as if she were to wake someone up, grabbed a book from her suitcase, trotted to the lesser used of the two desks, and sat politely, intent on waiting for the other girl to come back before she settled in proper. Ryou didn't like to have her own stuff handled, and she was ready to bet that the girl - Josephine - felt the same way, no matter how untidy she kept her room.

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_next: white lies (continued)_


	3. white lies, two

Dear lovely readers who have great taste:  
>I know I've let this baby hanging for a little while but now that I'm back into fic for good. It will be updated roughly once a month along with my other ongoing projects. ENJOY. -Milly<p>

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**blackout**

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two.

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Ryou nearly jumped when she heard a rattle against the door. Her heart skipped a beat. Gave a glance at her book; still at page one. Ryou brought a hand to her lips in alarm. _She'd been blacking out_.

A tall, lanky figure stepped in. She yelled by reflex when she took notice of Ryou's presence. It was the tomboy form downstairs. Ryou bit her lip, smiled, then looked around her in a panic, confused.

"Who're you?"

"I'm, my name is, oh gosh," Ryou should've seen this coming, why hadn't she picked another place to read, somewhere outside the room? Even though she was entitled to it, her current occupant might not know about her moving in, and right now she looked rightfully angry.

"I'm Ryou. We're roommates," she blurted out. "I mean I'm your new roommate. I'm sorry I intruded your space like this... I should've waited..." She stood up, ready to leave.

"Don't sweat it, it's okay. I believe you. Riyu?"

"Ryou. Bakura."

"Right. I'm Joey. Wheeler."

"Nice to meet you." Ryou bowed her head lightly.

"Stop that, I'm not the headmistress," she joked. 'Joey' kicked her shoes off one after the other, each one landing in a different spot. Ryou's mood was somehow uplifted by the girl's casual friendliness.

The ambient giggles outside the bedroom dwindled down to nothing all of a sudden. Ryou saw Kaiba's silhouette marching in the hallway, calling for silence with the playfulness of a presidential bodyguard at the very moment Josephine - no, Joey - closed the door behind her.

"I figured I couldn't keep all that space all to myself for too long," the boyish blonde said, plopping down on the other available chair. "So, why are you here? You don't look like a 's type of girl."

"What do you mean?" Not knowing what to do with her hands, Ryou fiddled with the paperback's cover. "What's a 's type of girl?"

Joey let out an unrestrained laugh. "A fucked up rich kid. Which, in case you haven't noticed, I am _not_." There was a hint of disdain and pride in her voice. "I'm here 'cause they want me on their sports team. When it's good for them..." She trailed off, shook her head and tsked. Her eyes were dancing all around the room. She was probably thinking on how to reorganize her space to accommodate the new occupant.

Josephine looked every bit like an athletic scholarship student; where Ryou had flabby, smooth limbs, Joey exhibited the smooth carvings of well toned muscle, just the right amount of body fat and shapely legs. It was extremely hard for Ryou not to look at the nipples peaking from under her loose, white top. The blond seemed completely oblivious to Ryou's uncontrollable ogling - and also, quite comfortable with her own body.

"This is sort of like jail, you know. There's some fucked up shit going on. Drugs and shit. I know at least a girl who went to rehab, and one to juvie. Just thought you should know."

"Wow," was all Ryou found to say.

"I mean, I'm just assuming... I mean you look like a good kid. Like, girly and pretty and stuff, not like, snobby or, you know." She scratched the back of her head nervously, then brought one knee up to her chin, resting one foot on her chair.

"I guess I do," offered Ryou with a meek laugh. "I'm not sure whether I'm a good girl like you say, though."

"Whaddaya mean? You bring library books past the due date? Bad girl," she joked again, then looked away awkwardly.

Somewhere inside Ryou's chest, something warmed up.

"So, right, you need to unpack and stuff. Erm..." She looked around and grinned sheepishly. "Sorry my crap's all over the place."

"No, no, that's not a problem, that's alright. You had all this place to yourself, right? It's normal you got comfortable," Ryou said.

"I guess, heh. Uhm... So, Up or down?"

"Up? Or down?"

"Your bed."

"Oh. I don't mind."

"Like hell you don't mind. Everybody has a preference."

"Okay, well... I'll just pick lower level, then."

She concluded, judging by the grin on Joey's face, that she'd picked the right answer.

"Alright then. Sheets are clean and all, but I got some crap on it. Don't worry, it's usually just my clean clothing. I'm too lazy to store it away properly, ha." She scratched her head in embarrassment.

"Can I help?" Ryou offered.

"N-No, I'm good," she managed, utterly unconvinced. "It'll take like, five minutes." Joey stood up and started tugging on limp sleeves that protruded from the upper bedding section.

Five minutes was a generous estimate... If she was going for the 'throw everything in the closet' method.

"Are you sure? I don't have anything else to do, you know. I really don't mind helping."

"Okay then, just throw these in those drawers there."

Ryou wouldn't have any of it. Clothing needed to be treated with respect. Before she knew it, she was diligently folding all of Joey's clothing.

"Hey! Don't do that. Really. You don't have to," Joey called out. She had climbed on the second level mattress and was dumping whatever pens and loose half used sheets of paper laid there forgotten. Ryou averted her eyes just before - no, too late - she caught sight of Joey's chest peeking from the opening of her tank top...

This time, the blonde seemed to notice, bringing a hand to her chest to flatten the fabric against her skin. "Sorry, didn't think I'd have company tonight, ha..."

"N-no," Ryou mumbled, and then she turned away and mumbled some more, completely aware that her new roommate could not possibly understand what she was saying.

"It's good now, you can set up your stuff."

Ryou heard her jump down and land on the floor loudly. She felt bad for the neighbour downstairs. Ryou wondered if Kaiba's dislike for Joey stemmed from the fact that... She probably got a lot of complaints from other inmates.

"No really, I'm good." Joey grabbed the soiled jeans Ryou was folding from her hands. "This goes to the laundry anyway. Don't sweat it! Just get settled and all, I'll handle the rest. It's my responsibility!"

She then gave Ryou a winsome smile that made her insides melt a little.

"Gotta give that back to somebody," she said, grabbing a handful of magazines from the floor. "Be right back."

So while she really could technically get changed into her pajamas and start her nighttime reading, the white haired girl didn't stop there.

She gathered together the remaining magazines and arranged them on the corner of the most lived in of the two desks - the one with half eaten cup noodles on it - and tossed these in the already full garbage can. Took down the worn out makeshift curtains (some old hair towel?) and folded it with the one other, plusher towel she had found and laid these on the bed. She paired sports and formal shoes together by the door, found a school bag underneath a pile of assorted sport tops and training bras that had holes in them and placed it near the shoes.

When Joey came back, the room looked almost livable. The smell remained still, but Ryou'd get used to it. For now. She was already planning to do a deep clean secretly, when Joey wasn't there.

"Jeez Louise, you didn't have to do that. At least wait for tomorrow morning. You wanna get changed first?"

"Sure." She'd say no, of course, but really didn't want to upset Joey. She unzipped her suitcase and began looking for her nighttime outfit.

"We share the bathroom with the room next to us, so make sure you lock both doors then you're in. Oh, and, don't mind the mess. Heheh."

Ryou turned around, her gear in hand, to see Joey give her most sheepish grin yet. She held back a wince and bravely laid a hand on the bathroom door, not willing just yet to open it.

This was going to be painful.


	4. white lies, three

**AN** Time to perform CPR on this story! This takes place in a boarding school for girls, so there will be talk of menses and that wonderful stuff that most authors usually overlook in their stories. But I'm not quite 'most authors'! So that dreadful time of the month will be addressed. Yours in femslash, **Milly**

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**blackout**

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three.

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Two knocks on the bathroom door. Ryou couldn't tell whether it was from the neighbours' side or if it was Joey knocking. She laid the cleaning product on the sink and cleared her voice, as if it took her effort to speak up.

"Y-yes?"

"Oh sorry, um, do you think you're going to be done soon? I really need to, um, to use the bathroom."

"Oh!" Ryou hadn't realized just how long she'd been locked in the tiny room, scrubbing and rinsing and scrubbing some more. She'd been surprised to even see some cleaning products under the sink; less so when she saw they had never been used. The safety seal was still on!

Some people had it in their personality to be a slob - well, not that Joey was a slob but, erm, let's say her sanitation standards somewhat differed from Ryou's - but if the two neighbours next door were as uncaring for grime and discarded hairs as Joey was, Ryou would have to pick 'cleaning' as her compulsory extra-curricular activity.

"Ryou?" The friendly blonde's voice called again. "You alright?"

"Yes! Yes! Just a second"

She took off the yellow rubber gloves, laid them on the side of the bath and opened the door to a very bashful looking Joey. She was holding something behind her back.

"Sorry, I sort of dozed out and-"

"Oh shit!" The blond exclaimed. "You didn't have to do that!" Her smile revealed that she was actually quite happy that Ryou had 'done that'. "I had no idea, like, I thought you were playing with the shower head or something." And then Joey let out a nervous sort of laugh that faded away gradually as she realized that the innuendo was lost on the pale girl.

Ryou double checked the interior of the bath and toilet. "It's pretty much done, I just need to do the floors, I'm almost done I swear!"

"You make me feel bad for being such a slob," Joey said with a bashful grin.

Ryou blushed at the word slob she herself had been using during her previous internal monologue. "No, no, it's normal, you've been busy with school is all," she started meekly.

"Nah, you're giving me too much credit. I don't really need to put that much effort into my studies to get a passing grade." She raised her arm above her head, leaning into her elbow against the doorframe in a decidedly rather macho and confident pose. Ryou couldn't help but notice that she was indeed a shaver - she'd seen two suction cup razor holders on the shower but wasn't sure whom they belonged to. "Perks of being the track and field star of the school. So, erm, I don't mean to ruin all your good work, but..."

The sentence hung in mid-air. A lightbulb lit itself above Ryou's head.

"Are you alright? Do you feel ill? I'm- I'm sorry I was in the way!"

Joey laughed nervously some more. "No, it's um, it's not that, it's just... Er... I'll try not to dirty everything, I guess."

"What do you mean?"

Joey held out a small, funnel shaped, transparent contraption. She gave it a squeeze, revealing the material's flexible characteristic.

"What... What's that?" Ryou asked, wide-eyed.

"Blood goes in there. I fucking hate pads, they smell and they get sticky and gross. This is so much better. I guess this is the one thing you can't lend a girlfriend, but you should definitely look into buying one."

Understanding dawned on Ryou's face. "Oh. Ohhh. Oh I see. Erm, take your time," she said as she exited the premises, squeezing herself between Joey and the door frame, eager not to touch either. She kept her eyes cast to the ground and only dared looking up once she heard the click of the bathroom door behind her.

So she was on her period. And she was using this weird... basket thing... Ryou had never heard about anything like that. She thought of the piles of pads lurking in her luggage and... well, she'd have to make sure to keep them away from the blonde's sight.

Now after barely an hour spent quietly picking up tiny hairs and cobwebs (yes, cobwebs) Ryou hadn't expected to come back to a slightly disorderly bedroom. It seemed like Joey just couldn't help herself; in search of tomorrow's change of clothes, maybe, she'd managed to undo much of Ryou's neat folding and arranging. The 'shoe spot' was a mess again.

But Ryou didn't mind. She was used picking up after other people's mistakes and wrongdoings. Especially since these 'other people' dwelled inside of her more often than not.

.

"So this is Triss, or Trista, but her real name is Christina actually. Her little brother couldn't do his K's for the longest time until he saw a speech path and used to call her that, so it stuck."

"Oh." Ryou was looking at Joey's yearbook from last year. In all honesty Ryou would have preferred to catch up on sleep, but Joey was so enthusiastic about 'introducing' her to her friends that Ryou hadn't been able to refuse. As a result they were looking at 'you had to be there' pictures of people Ryou would meet face to face in less than four hours now.

"... goes back to live with her grandfather in the summer. It's kind of hard to raise a girl when you're just the one old man, so that's why she's here."

"What did you say her name was again?"

"Yugi. Yeah I know it's a weird kind of name. Actually until like, two years ago I didn't give two shits about her. But she just won me over, man, we're best friends."

"She won you over," Ryou echoed, all-too aware of how good she was at active listening, and at how well it worked on Joey.

"Yeah, I don't know, before coming here I was kind of a bad person. I don't know. I don't really like to think about it. It's like - it's a part of my life that's behind me now, type of thing."

"You look like a very nice person to me."

"You're just saying that," Joey said, pulling the cotton sheet over her lap like a protective armor, "there's lots of me you don't know about. I don't know you that well yet but you look to me like the kind of girl who's always been surrounded with good and doesn't really know anything else."

It would be tempting to mirror Joey's comment on 'not knowing things' about her, but Ryou shushed herself. It would be like jinxing it; if the blackouts ceased here at Saint-Mary's, all for the better, and people would never have to know about her shady past. Her condition. "I wished I had brought pictures, too, to share," she simply said. _I wished I had friends to talk about_.

"Yugi has a camera, actually. We're going to make our own pictures, trust me."

"We?"

"Yeah! You're kind of cool and pretty nice, I can't see why you wouldn't be part of the gang."

_Thanks but no thanks_, Ryou thought. _It was nice of you to tell me about your friends, and I'm sure I'll see them in class and maybe chit chat a bit when waiting in line at the cafeteria, but that's about it. I'm not planning on starting something I can't finish. _

"No, for real!" Joey added, interpreting Ryou's silence about right. "I'm telling you, they're gonna love you. Yugi is pretty quiet and all, she'll like you. Plus there's always three of us and that's kind of an awkward number, don't you think? Especially during lunch and everything."

No, this was not about Ryou being the shy new girl afraid she won't be able to make friends. It was more a matter of dreading she wouldn't cause their deaths.

"And- and- like three isn't a good number. Like, there are things all three of us have in common, you know, but there are things only Yugi and I kind of get, or that only Tris and I get, and well I guess there's things Tris and Yugi care more about but not me, like that whole school thing, haha, so anyway, bottom line is, there's always one of us who is bound to feel like a third wheel, you know? Four is just the right number," she concluded triumphantly, nodding her head emphatically, arms crossed over her modest chest.

"So you only want me to palliate that missing spot on the team," Ryou said quietly, keeping her smile in check.

"What?" That Joey was asking herself, genuinely searching her brain for what she'd been saying that could be misinterpreted. "No, that's, like, that's not it at all! I just want to hang out with you because you're you, like, you're super nice and smart and cute and everything. I mean, I _am_ sitting in your bed, if that means anything at all." The blonde stopped herself before she said something more embarrassing, and Ryou had the decency to pretend not to notice the blush creeping on her cheeks.

"I know," Ryou added, as quietly as before, "I was just pulling your leg." And then she allowed herself to smile.

Joey laughed in relief at Ryou's faint snark. "Well I sort of suspected that no one could be _that_ nice," she said before quickly adding "I'm joking, I'm joking, seriously you really are super nice, I'm really really lucky to have the bestest roommate in the whole school!"

"Best roommate?"

"Well," Joey blushed some more, to the point where it grew impossible to ignore it. "I mean, like, yeah, yeah you're like some kind of angel who, erm, who cleans the bathroom and is... amazingly good at folding clothing and all." She then sported one shameless, silly, 'asking for favors' type of grin.

Ryou allowed herself a chuckle. "You know, Josephine, flattery will only get you so far," she said. "And I would've done it anyway. If you want to we can lump our laundry together and I'd take care of everything. I'm used to it, I don't mind at all." She smiled for good measure, and it didn't feel like it was putting either of them in danger. "Really."

Joey scratched the back of her head, something Ryou had seen her done a countless amount of time since she'd set foot in her new room - less than ten hours ago. "Well I gotta admit that it's not my greatest skill. If you could do that, that would be great. I'll make it up to you, I promise."

"Oh, you don't need to," Ryou said automatically.

_Just try to stay alive. _

.


End file.
